when I was in junior high school, I wrote a *paper* for Bahasa Indonesia entitled Psychosomatic. It is about how your mind affecting your body. I was still naive at that time, so I just copy and paste from a book entitled more or less the same. That book saying that, you can heal your pain, just by positively thinking that you can heal. That thing apply reversibly.
Now, for the recent 6 months, I’m facing a deep problem, that I still cannot solve. I feel, that I’m loosing my skills as processing geophysicist. I’m loosing my analytical skills, and my judgment skills. I can also mentioned that I’m loosing my reasoning skills in taking some judgment. Negative emotions control myself. Almost 80% of my processing is a poor result. I know the problem is not only from my processing side. But also in data quality. Some un-smart acquisition design with high expectation of getting good results.
I was wondering, was it because I have bad feeling in my mind, that makes all signal in my data become bad. I don’t have logical reason for that. But, lets say Picasso is in bad mood, will he make a good painting? Or you can see the scratch of anger in his painting? I’m no Picasso, but I’m close to an artist 🙂 I need to decrease the noise level, so that the signal has lot more meaning. It’s an art of signal processing 😛
I’m no artist, I’m no good geophysicist. But I’m still a human being. Maybe I’m just saturated, maybe I’m just stressful. Once I was a good geophysicist. Now just some shitty employee doing work with half-hearted. That’s so fookin stupid. Just like supernova facing their sucked by it’s own gravity. The artist that buried himself with his own paint. Now I’m just the reverse thing of Midas. Everything I touch is broken.
Life sucks. Unfortunately I’m just too fookin lazy to fix it. Fook it!