Akhirnya memang malas

Paling susah memang membuat keputusan. Dan yang lebih susah lagi adalah menjalani konsekuensi dari keputusan itu. Okelah, kalau konsekuensinya adalah baik, lah kalau jelek. Sudah beberapa kali saya menulis tentang ini. Saya pikir wajar, karena memang setiap menit dari hidup ini adalah pilihan, kita bisa memilih untuk tidur saja, atau mengisi dengan hal yang lebih berguna. Atau let’s just time past you bye, as I always do. Procrastinating

Yang paling ga enak adalah memilih karena memang kita harus memilih padahal kita tidak ingin pilhan itu. Kita harus begini, karena satu hal mengharuskan begitu. Di sisi lain, pilihan itu adalah hal baru yang mungkin membawa pengalaman baru, tapi sayangnya kita tidak berminat dengan pengalaman itu. Kita tidak ingin dipaksa, tapi keterpaksaan, kadang adalah awal dari suatu kesuksesan. Jadinya semua bingung kan

Mungkin yang kita takutkan adalah tanggung jawab. Atau mungkin kita malas. Ah, betul, yang sangat cocok dengan situasi saya adalah, saya malas.

Setelah Dua Minggu

Dahulu, setelah sebulan pergi permanen meninggalkan rumah demi sekolah ke Bandung (bahkan mungkin tidak sebulan, kurang dari itu, persisnya saya lupa), saya balik lagi ke Jakarta. Perlahan ketika kereta yang membawa saya dari Bandung, memasuki stasiun Gambir, melihat monas, sekian camuk perasaan yang saya rasakan. Entah senang kembali ke rumah, atau mungkin menyesali kepergian dari rumah. Kini sudah dua minggu persis saya meninggalkan Jakarta, untuk permanen tinggal di negara sebelah. Tidak permanen juga sih, karena work permitnya hanya 2 tahun. Entah setelah itu kemana lagi.

Seperti halnya dulu, sekarang pun diri saya tidak banyak berubah. Meski mengklaim diri saya sebagai perencana ulung, lebih banyak rencana saya yang gagal pada kenyataannya. Seperti sekarang, saya tahu seharusnya saya lebih perlahan dalam mengambil keputusan. Apalagi keputusan yang berhubungan dengan uang. Tapi karena kadung sudah banyak pikiran. Akhirnya saya putuskan saja tanpa pikir panjang. Dua hari setelah ambil keputusan itu, sekarang saya menyesali, harusnya lebih sabar lagi dalam mengambil keputusan. Pastinya ga tau kan apa yang saya maksud Gak apa-apa, blog ini memang penuh muslihat. Lagian siapa juga yang mengundang situ datang kemari

Anyway, 0 KM dari perjalanan panjang telah jauh dilewati. Bahkan 1.000 KM di depan jalan yang sekarang pun sudah terlihat kira-kira seperti apa. Jadi saya kira, mari berjalan. Semoga Yang Maha Kuasa meridoi dan melancarkan perjalanan kali ini. Amin

Bulan Ini, Tahun Ini

We don’t stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing.

Quote yang cukup terkenal dari Novelis Irlandia, George Bernard Shaw. Ini quote cukup mengena di saya, kita bilang kita telah menua, kini tagihan sudah menumpuk, kerja keras di depan mata, tak ada waktu untuk bermain. Bagi saya kita bukan saja menjadi tua. Tapi kita telah kehilangan sejatinya diri kita semua. Deep inside ourself, we are a child. A child that full of curiosity. A child who always eager to want to know everything in front of him. Dalam kata lain, saya kehilangan jiwa kanak-kanak saya yang ingin selalu mencoba, mencari hal baru, mengoprek, dan lain sebagainya, just for sake of fulfilling the curiosity.

I lost it. Saya mau menyalahkan pilihan pekerjaan saya. Tapi pada kenyataannya, mungkin hanyalah permasalahan pembagian waktu. Tahun ini semuanya harus berubah. Bagi waktu, temukan lagi kreatifitas, berkarya, dan berbagi dengan sesama.

Update on VSP Modeling & Processing With Seismic Unix – April 2013

Last year I published my script on VSP modeling and processing. And now when I’ve looked back at the script, I’ve found so many errors. I’ve updated the script and added one or two features, if anyone of you have free time, maybe you can help me to improve this scripts.

First major issue, that actually I had realized it last year was about the synthetic modeling using Ela2D. I don’t know how to set it up properly for VSP geometry besides setting the receiver to be increasing with depth. Because, the synthetic model produced the waveforms too slow. Maybe “too slow” is not the right term, so basically, the issue was when I processed the synthetic datasets for flat subsurface layering, the upgoing does not come out as a flat reflection. So maybe the direct P modeling/computation that I set in the script was not correct. I haven’t solved this issue, but I probably want to switch to SOFI2D from Univ. Karlsruhe for Synthetic Modeling.

Second major issue, that I haven’t solved is scripting for waveshaping deconvolution. Which is VSP style of up by down deconvolution. Seismic Unix provided sushape in doing Wiener-Levinson waveshaping deconvolution, but somehow I failed to scripted for VSP deconvolution. CUrrently I am using supef, prediction error filtering, which I think sufficient enough in my case.

Last, though I think overall scripting is sufficient for the exercise of processing zero offset VSP, I still feel uncomfortable with the quality of the results. Things such as, using trace numbering for index in median separation looks not robust, the Seismic Unix band pass filtering looks changing the shape of wavelet around break time too much. So maybe if I have time, I can improve it again.

So, if you have time, have a look at my note on VSP processing and modeling using seismic unix here www.gm2001.net/latihanvspsu and www.github.com/fahdi104/latihanvspsu. I’ve also written some description in this page http://inversi.wordpress.com/vsp-modeling-processing-with-seismic-unix/

Turning Point

This is not the right time for me to write actually. My Milan has just lost at the hand of Barca for 4-0. Not a good night But, before the idea of this post just vanished into thin air, I’d better write it down as soon as possible.

For the past year, I have been dwelling in a laziness feeling. Everyday I feel demotivated. I would blame my professional work, because there is no variation in challenges and activities. But then again, my company has given me the opportunity to move up North to East for a job that I want, but I refused it, just because I was too scared for it and many other factor. Days went by. Week after Week, month after month, few years passed. I’ve never thought of anything else besides cursing my current situation and the desire to move to other track.

And then again, I’ve never thought a big company contacted me, invited me to Singapore for short interview, and then scheduled for teleconference. This was a huge experience for me. The stupid me was never prepared better for the interview. Why? Because I was kept thinking to myself of moving track, and sees no future for me in borehole seismic. The job that I am doing right now. The interview as expected was f**ked up. I was able to answer most of the questions but I don’t think my answer was quite satisfying for them. The day after the interview, I suddenly realized that on the other side of the world, there are actually people doing cool stuff with borehole seismic. And I think I am just on the wrong side of the world. I see some turning point, but I haven’t make the turn yet.

In fact, I haven’t turned at all until today. I kept going back and forth, trying hard to figure what is actually that I want. After the interview, I tried to settled down myself for this job, and tried to be all out for this job. Forgetting the past, telling myself that is the real dream. I am making like 1 degree by 1 degree of turning.

But I think I was enlighten by the fact that there is a mountain to climb, and I am already at the bottom of this mountain. I have to climb the mountain in front of me, not the other mountain that is far away from this.

Ah, what am I writing here. Crap!

Course that I wish I took in University

You can never connect the dots forwards, you can only do it backwards, Steve Job said. And the experience also said, that regret always come late. Now I understand why I should pay more attention back in university, and should have learned/took course on these subject, these are good to be a kind of geophysicist that I want to be today,

• Numerical Method/Numerical Programming: This is a good to understand most of the seismic processing algorithm, especially the imaging one. Heck, this is actually fundamental to understand how most of your equations applied in computer.
• Rock Physics – Petrophysics – Formation Evaluation: You never know what’s inside the earth until you drill a hole inside and look at the formation by your own eyes if you are superman, but at least have a look at what those tools read to understand the formations.
• More Geology course: yes, at I took Sedimentology, Stratigraphy, Structural Geology, but please pay more attention to what the lecturer teach

Feel free to add some more. I think I’ve missed a lot of things.

Sakit Sendiri

Indahnya kegelapan, sejuknya kesunyian, damainya kebencian, nikmatnya kepedihan, di rumah ini kunikmati sakit sendiri.
Sakit Sendiri by rumahsakit band (@_rumahsakit),